The Farm

                                          

They warned me to stay away from Farmer McNully's farm. They warned me that he was strict and didn't take any guff. Everybody always acted like he was some sort of crazy magic boogeyman that could make people disappear. I didn't care... I couldn't help myself...
                                                                 

      ...his daughters were so FUCKIN' HOT! There was Lula Mae who loved to ride bareback.
                                                                       

          There was Bessie Lou who needed to be milked as much as the cows on the farm.
                                                                         

Then, there was my favorite... Delilah. She also had the build of a heifer... with the lust of a bull. Oddly, despite having three daughters, as far as anyone could tell, Farmer McNully never had a wife.
I was sneaking around the farm looking for the first McNully daughter I could find, when I found a new one I'd never seen before. I was surprised to see that she was Asian. I thought it was kinda funny since the only Asian person that I ever saw around town was this lost business fella who was having car trouble. The girl told me that her name was Jessie Lee McNully, and that she was adopted. I thought that was strange too, since she looked to be in her early twenties like me, but I didn't care since she was coming on to me something powerful, and she had what her adopted sisters had...
                                                                    

 ...in abundance. It was certainly a pleasure to meet the newest McNully girl. That is, until we got a little too loud and her daddy came barging into the room! I was scared shitless and ready to grab my clothes and hightail it out of there, but before I could, Farmer McNully held out his hands and a big white flash of light hit me. I started feeling really funny as I forgot where I was for a minute, and then I passed out.

That was a while ago. Things are a whole hell of a lot different now. No one even tried to look for me. They didn't want Farmer McNully to do something even worse to them. That's probably for the best, because I learned what happened to all the people who had disappeared at McNully's farm over the years. A lot of them ended up as farm animals, but the lucky few like me, my uncle Lou, ol' man Frank Normons, Farmer Willis, and that Asian business fella at least got to stay human. My only question is...
                                                                        

...why does Farmer McNully insist on us calling him "Pa"? Girls don't have sex with their daddies nearly as much as we have to. Oh well, time for another milking...