Breaking and Entering

*DING-DONG!*
                                                                           

                                             "Ugh! Finally!... God, these things are heavy!"
                                                                          

"Hey, what's- JESUS CHRIST! I mean... Hello there, ma'am. Um... Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your personal-"                    "Carl, you idiot, it's me! Ya know, your PARTNER in this HEIST?"
                                                                       

      "LEO?! But... but how?!"      "I don't know, okay! Just stop staring and come in. No one's here."
                                                                             

 "This is... this is..."     "Impossible, I know. Sit down over here and I'll tell you what happened..."
                                                                         

"As you know, we've been planning this job for months. Business tycoon Richard Johnson's loaded, so we planned to rob him blind after observing him and seeing when he left the house."
                                                                          

                           "I broke in and cased the place while you waited in the getaway car."
                                                                                 

"While I was looking around, I found this necklace. For some reason, I really wanted to put it on... and when I did... I turned into this!"              
"An extra large order of sexy black curves in a small package!"

                                                                    "What?"               

  "I mean it! You look incredible! Way better than a pudgy white guy in his 40s like you were!"
                                                                       

                                      "You really think so?"      "Of course! You look HOT!"
                                                                              

                      "Well... I've never noticed it before, but you look good too... Mmm!"
                                                                             

"Ew, no! God, what am I thinking! I can't think. It's this damn necklace! It's still changing me! First my body and clothes, and now my MIND! I've tried and tried, but the damn thing won't come off! What the hell is this damn thing, some kind of fucked up security system?!...What the hell am I gonna do? I'm actually thinking about fucking men!"

"Well, maybe if you do fuck a man, then the necklace will come off..."                                                                                    

                                                                                    "Huh?"
"Yeah, maybe that's what it takes to break the curse, or whatever..."                                                            

                                                                   "Hmm... Maybe..." 
                                                                               

                 "...Or maybe you just want to taste these big chocolate titties! You're lucky I'm horny..."
                                                                          *suck, suck* "Oh God, YES!"
                                                                                

"Oh yes, Leo, YES! Fuck, how are you so good at that?!"  *slurp* "Hmmph- mmmph!..." *slurp*
                                                                                

                              "God, that thing is huge! That's exactly what I need right now..."
                                                                             

                                        "Carl, I need you to gimme that big dick right now!"
                                                                           

                                                            "Fill this pussy up!"
                                                                             

                   "Well, you always were the boss..."
                                                                            -"OH FUCK!"   -"OH FUCK!"
                                                                             

                                                      "OH, YES, YES! FUCK ME!"
                                                                              

                                                       "This pussy is all yours! OH!"
                                                                              

                                                 "Oh yeah, you like that, don't you bitch?"
                                                                               

                                                               "OH, YES! FUCK ME!"
                                                                              

                                                                  "OOOOOOOH!"
                                                                                

                 "Heh, I never thought that I'd be 'partners' with you in this way... Oh, fuck!"
                                                                           

"Damn, these big ass titties feel so good!"      "Mmm, I love the way you fuck them with your big long dick... "                                                                              

         "Oh God, baby! This is the best dick I've ever had!"            "Wait, what?..."
                                                                                 

                                                                "I'M CUMMMING!!!"
                                                                              

                                                    "Oh, fuck, I'm about to cum too!"
                                                                               

                                              "Take THIS, bitch! OH, FUUUUUUUCK!!!" 

                                                                            

*pant, pant*
"Okay... Carlo, or whatever your name is, that was great, but you should get the hell outta here now, before I call the cops. My husband's gonna be home soon."
         "Huh?... Oh, right... I guess I'll be off, then... I just feel like... I'm forgetting something..."
                                                                            

"You mean my husband's belongings? Yeah, here's a little tip: next time you try to rob someone's home... bring a partner."